Friday, November 21, 2008

At Six Months - 11/21/08

I've written a poem to commemorate the sixth month since Warren's passing. The last few days have been good ones, but overall this has been the hardest time yet. I've heard that this place in grief is called the pit and I can now understand why.



A Dark Place


Half a year gone already.

Spring turned into Summer then Autumn,

Winter is coming on fast.


Where you once stood beside me

There is an empty space,

An empty place at the table,

An empty half of the bed.


I've taken your name off of things.

Your clothes are gone except for your baseball cap which hangs by the door.

When I put it up to my face, I can still breathe you in.


A thousand daggers hide in ordinary things.

The things that changed, the things that haven't changed, both cut the same.

How can I still be living when so much of who I was is gone?


Hollowed out and insubstantial;

Grief leaves a mark on the landscape,

Like glaciers, inexorable and unforgiving, cold.


Half a year gone.

Half a year gone.

Half a year gone.


by C. Jones, Nov. 2008

20 comments:

  1. nice poem. hope all is well with you. hang in there, trust in God and everything will be ok. God bless.

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  2. Beautiful. I lost my grandpa a year ago next week. Him and I were very close. I believe our loved ones that pass are always with us.

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  3. MOM...this was very moving and extremely well written. Much love your way today...sniff...

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  4. (((((Cheryl))))) This is a powerful piece. I'm moved... and suddenly... I know you better. :( I'll share your sadness today so you don't have to carry it alone ...

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  5. I am crying ...my heart aches for the pain I know you still feel, the emptiness, the alone even when your not, but time will start to heal and mend some of that... I promise. What a moving and emotional poem...I could feel you through the words.

    I want to wrap my arms around you and give you a big HUG! Know that you are loved by us all.

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  6. ((((((((((Ms Cheryl))))))))))))) I'm sorry for the loss and pain that you feel. I always say that death leaves more questions than answers,,,but one day we will know the reasons why...and be united as one again with our loved ones.....

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  7. Hope you don't mind me visiting - this is a lovely poem.
    It will be 9 years at Christmas since my husband died. I just felt like I was in a tunnel and eventually I got to see the end of it - I don't beleive time heals, you just find the strength to cope better.
    I'll think about you and know you will get to the end of the tunnel, hugs.

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  8. Helen, your right, time can only heal so much but time does help you find away to live with out them, you in time learn to face each day with renewed strength.

    I had to come back and read this again...I just want to HUG you!

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  9. Thank you all for your kind words and hugs. It means a lot to me.

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  10. I know from my own experiences what you mean by the pit. Your poem is lovely. Know you're in my thoughts.

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  11. Cheryl, thank you so much for sharing so honestly with us through this. Perhaps it helps us all to know that, even in our most lonely, painful moments, there are others who share our experience and understand. This is a very generous gift you give us. Helenjo is right - we do learn to cope better and the months and years pass. Time is both our enemy and our healer. Blessings to you, dear lady, now and in the days to come. And, oh, yes - very eloquently put!

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  12. Jesa thank you. My hope is that someone else living through the death of a loved one will see that there is change over time. Writing it down, helps me to see that as well. Its not always change for the better, but it is movement. There is a saying "when you're going through hell, keep going."

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  13. I like that saying! I should have it tattooed on the inside of my eyelids...

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  14. Jesa that might prove to be its own kind of hell.

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