Happy New Year - 1/1/2008

I wish you all a very happy, prosperous and healthy New Yeark.

This Says It All - 12/29/07

I don't have much to say these days.  Warren's condition is stable, but his pain is increasing.  We live day to day and managed to have a nice Christmas even knowing it was our last together.

From My House to Yours Merry Christmas - 12/25/07

Hospice Visit Day - 12/19/07

Wednesday is Hospice visit day. The nurse will be here at 12:30 to check on Warren and order the medications that we're starting to run low on. After that, I have a busy afternoon of shopping for groceries so I don't have to go again until AFTER Christmas, going to the bank, getting a hair cut and taking Warren to get his hair cut.

His condition seems to be stable at the moment which is a good thing. His pain is mostly under control and we don't see anything new that has cropped up in the last week. We've settled into a routine (well I've settled into a routine...which I've been avoiding ever since I retired) of going to bed early and getting up at 8:00 a.m. I really have to do this so that I can fix his breakfast around 8:30 and he can take his morning pain meds. We are just enjoying being together. This may be the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

A Laugh for Friday - 12/14/07

Somewhere  near Rochester  , New  York  , Ed set out to bag his buck at 5:30 a.m. By 11:30 a.m. , he was  exhausted and hungry--and still no buck. At 12 noon, the mighty hunter Ed guards the remains of his lunch while a passerby snaps  a quiet photo while trying not to startle the deer with a belly  laugh .



Shot  from the USS HONOLULU (Los  Angeles-class fast attack submarine) at the  Arctic  Circle ,  280 miles from the North Pole--is there anything that scares a polar  bear?



A definite entrepreneurial spirit




Consider yourself warned





Let's  get all bases covered .




Clearly,  you're not wanted on this  property!




And  who said politics is boring?  



My personal favorite . .  

 

With This Ring - 12/12/07

Today is our 26th wedding anniversary. This is the first year in awhile that we haven't spent it at NIH. One year Warren had a feeding tube removed, the next chemo all day. Yesterday we went out and he finally purchased the big TV he's been thinking about for years. We all assumed he would never buy it, but he surprised us all. It was delivered this morning and every time I look up and see it, I'm surprised by how big it is. Its a 46" LCD. I'm glad he didn't pick the 50" that I had my eye on. I think that would have just been too big. I think what finally made him buy was the fact that the old TV (16 years old) was starting to have problems with the sound and he didn't want me to have to deal with it later on. Hopefully he'll be able to enjoy the rest of the football season in HD.

Happy Anniversary Babe. You are the best husband in the world. I love you with all my heart.

Happy Birthday Dave - 12/10/07

Even though we celebrated yesterday, today is my son Dave's real birthday.  I usually use number candles on our family cakes but didn't have 2 threes so I had to improvise.  Of course now it looks like Dave turned 3,111.  Well he does fantasize about being a time lord (Dr. Who).

Dave and Warren:

Daughter Jen (spent the day painting her living room...just wants this to be over):

Granddaughter Megan (always up for cake and ice cream):

I'm the one wielding the camera so I'm not in any of the shots.  One would think I do that on purpose :-).

Looks Like Christmas

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas even though our snow has all melted away today.  You can see I have my tree up and the gifts for Warren and I are wrapped and ready.  The Santas are on the mantle.  The flash on the camera seems to have put some weird lines on the mirror.  That glass is beveled and very old so I suspect that's why the lines are wavy.

I didn't go to my Mom's today because they are iced in up there so I got to spend Saturday here.  I celebrated by taking a nap.  Other than that, I've done nothing today.

I've taken over dispensing Warren's many medications to him.  I purchased one of those am/pm pill holders that hold seven days worth of meds but soon realized that that didn't take care of the problem.  So I purchased 3 more individual 7-day pill dispensers.  No we have wake up pills, breakfast, lunch, dinner, and bedtime dispensers.  Its a complicated regimen.

He seems to be doing OK at the moment.  He sleeps some during the day and spends his time watching tv or playing on the computer.

Tomorrow my kids and granddaughter are coming over so we can celebrate my son Dave's birthday.  He'll turn 33 on Monday.  Its hard to believe that my baby will be 33.

We're taking one day at a time here.

Closing Doors - 12/4/07

Here it is December already. Its cold and windy here today and tomorrow we may get our first snow of the season. I don't have anyplace I have to be tomorrow other than here, so snow is fine with me. I might even bake some Christmas cookies.

Today we went to NIH for a checkup. Warren has gained 2-1/2 kilos since his last visit on Nov. 20th. I have always refused to learn the metric system, but I think that's around seven pounds. It appears to be fluid as the left side of his face appears puffy and he's had some swelling in the legs and ankles. His lungs are clear though. They told us they would continue to supply the medications that hospice won't cover (like his blood pressure and thyroid meds). Hospice is only allowed to cover the cancer-related drugs and those needed to control symptoms. Having NIH send us the others will be helpful as I won't have to go to our family physician in Greenbelt to get them. They can be mailed here. The NIH people were sad today too and said they will miss seeing him. Although we made an appointment for January 7th, it remains to be seen if we'll be able to do it or not.

Warren came to the same conclusion I had that he wasn't physically able to withstand the prep and the treatments for the cyber-knife radiation. Cyber knife wouldn't have offered a cure, only some management of symptoms and we will seek other remedies here for those now. We have closed the door on further treatments. We are entering into a holy space where a soul prepares to make its transition. I am trying to make this as gentle a passing as possible by surrounding him with love and support in the comfort of our home. It is part of our humanity to ease our love ones through in times of change.

Remember that each day is a precious gift, be mindful how you use it.